Wednesday 23 November 2011

I'm thinking of becoming Amish and I'm taking my 9 year old with me

I like to think of myself as being a “cool Mummy”. You know, one of those Mums who is up with the lingo (does calling it “lingo” instantly disqualify from the cool label I wonder?) 


I’m familiar with the latest technology. I have a Twitter account, a Facebook account and I use the internet daily for work. I am aware of the sort of stuff they play on Top 40 radio these days. I know all about the TV shows that kids are watching. I have a 9 year old daughter and I’ve tried to instil a certain savvy-ness in her about all these things.




We don’t listen to commercial radio in the car or at home. We don’t watch Video Hits. I choose not to promote the values expressed in a lot of this music to my daughter. She’s heard many of these songs from her peers and from friends. I know I can’t prevent her from hearing top 40 songs and seeing music videos in other places. My theory is, our home is our sanctuary and I make the rules and set the boundaries. I just hope that once she is out in the world she is able to make good choices about what is and is not worthwhile, healthy, sensible and valuable.




So you can imagine how I felt when my 9 year old daughter came home from the school disco last Friday night with a copy of a CD containing songs they had been dancing to like “Sexy and I Know It”, “Champagne Showers” and “Last Friday Night”.




Let me just highlight the two key aspects of that sentence “9 year old daughter” and “school disco”.




One of the songs “Sexy and I Know It” was played at the disco apparently and the children were encouraged to chant the chorus “Sexy and I Know It” by the school employed DJ. This choice tune includes the delightful lyrics:




I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it

I'm sexy and I know it

I'm sexy and I know it...




The children were then encouraged to “wiggle it, wiggle it, wiggle it”while chanting the lyrics.




Um, is it just me or is this a rather extraordinary contradiction in messages? On one hand, we are concerned about the sexualisation of young children in our society. We are trying to teach them safety on the internet, in the school yard and in the world in general. Then we are running a school function and encouraging them to dance and chant the words “I’m sexy and I know it”.




Another song which was played was “Last Friday Night” by Katy Perry. Katy Perry is a hugely successful singer and was recently the voice of “Smurfette” in “The Smurfs” movie. The kids love her. Here are some of the lyrics to this happy tune.




There's a stranger in my bed,

There's a pounding in my head


We went streaking in the park

Skinny dipping in the dark

Then had a menage a trois


Pictures of last night

Ended up online

I'm screwed

Oh well

It's a blacked out blur

But I'm pretty sure

It ruled




So hang on, my daughter is at a school function dancing to songs that say that “blacking out” from drinking “rules”? Hmmm. “What’s wrong with this picture?” I ask myself. “Everything” is the answer.




The song “Champagne Showers” has lyrics such as “flash your titties like mardi gras” and walk out the party with a hottie or two”. If you think that is a little out of line for kids to be listening to, have a look at the music video. The words that come to mind are pornography, deeply offensive and misogynistic.




These days, kids go online and Google the lyrics to songs (not like in my day when you had to tape the song and listen to it over and over and try to decipher the words). They may not understand the deeper meaning of these songs but is that an excuse? It seems so in some people’s minds. When a parent asked the DJ at the school disco to stop playing these inappropriate songs he replied that “the kids love it and they don’t understand the words anyway”. Right! Great answer. Not.




Am I alone in feeling this way? Am I out of touch? Why are we not protecting our kids more from this sort of garbage? Don’t we want to give our kids a consistent message about personal safety, about respect, about treating people with dignity and behaving with dignity? How do songs that promote binge drinking and promiscuous sexual behaviour fit with our desire to raise happy, healthy kids? Isn’t that what we all want for our children? If so, why are we all just sitting back and letting this drivel infiltrate society and invade our kid’s mind?




I wrote to the principal of the school about the disco and the music content. She neatly hand-balled it to the P&C and I am yet to hear back. I’m not holding my breath. In the meantime, I’m considering becoming Amish.

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